You see, my medical oncologist is rather gentlemanly for lack of a better description. So there I sit with my sweet man and my oncologist discussing it all – it is the next five years of my life after all, and well along came the very quiet comment “it, ummm, may, uhhhh, cause vaginal dryness.”
Ahh yes a $20 buzz kill phrase, “vaginal dryness.”
Alas I had already read up on that cheery fact. And to those who are reading this and are saying “I can’t believe she is talking about those side effects” I say – what? It’s a side effect along with small percentage potential for thrombosis, secondary cancers, hot flashes, etc. It’s reality.
This drug throws a woman into chemically induced menopause to stop the hormones if you have a hormone driven breast cancer. It’s not pretty, but I for one don’t want to do this whole thing twice.
Back to the exam room. What the heck to say after such a pronouncement with your guy sitting with you in the exam room…
“Does that mean I will be hitting up the K-Y Jelly aisle?” I quipped (Sorry, irreverent but what the hell else was I supposed to say? ‘How lovely, pass the crumpets.”)
I think I almost made my oncologist blush. Poor man. He gets to talk about all the fun stuff and put up with my sometimes warped sense of humor. He laughed. (well it was funny, people)
So here I am on the precipice of the next stage. And I have been sick now for four days straight which really blows.
I am still curled up on the couch in a warm quilt with no desire to move very far. I am beat and my eyelids still feel heavy and hot. My sweet man has been an awesome nurse – and he bakes bread too. Too bad I can’t smell anything….
Ok so maybe this fatigue and compromised immune system is normal after spending in essence seven weeks in a daily microwave,but may I say again I am tired of feeling like shit?
Back to sleep with me. That way maybe I can stop stressing about how I will rally for the office tomorrow. Right now I can’t imagine remaining upright for eight hours straight. I know all this will pass and eventually this will all be a bunch of memories recorded by a blog, but it’s getting pretty damn boring right now.