not so subliminal message to ignore breast cancer?

  
All our lives since we developed breasts, we are told to self check, have mammograms and above all else swiftly deal with breast cancer. But of course, along comes a study basically telling us in my opinion to play Russian Roulette with our lives.

New York Times: Doubt Is Raised Over Value of Surgery for Breast Lesion at Earliest Stage

By GINA KOLATAAUG. 20, 2015

As many as 60,000 American women each year are told they have a very early stage of breast cancer — Stage 0, as it is commonly known — a possible precursor to what could be a deadly tumor. And almost every one of the women has either a lumpectomy or a mastectomy, and often a double mastectomy, removing a healthy breast as well…..

…..Diagnoses of D.C.I.S., involving abnormal cells confined to the milk ducts of the breast, have soared in recent decades. They now account for as much as a quarter of cancer diagnoses made with mammography, as radiologists find smaller and smaller lesions. But the new data on outcomes raises provocative questions: Is D.C.I.S. cancer, a precursor to the disease or just a risk factor for some women? Is there any reason for most patients with the diagnosis to receive brutal therapies? If treatment does not make a difference, should women even be told they have the condition?

……The stakes in this debate are high. Karuna Jaggar, executive director of Breast Cancer Action, an education and activist organization, said women tended not to appreciate the harms of overtreatment and often overestimated their risk of dying of cancer, making them react with terror.

“Treatment comes with short- and long-term impacts,” Ms. Jaggar said, noting that women who get cancer treatment are less likely to be employed several years later and tend to earn less than before. There are emotional tolls and strains on relationships. And there can be complications from breast cancer surgery, including lymphedema, a permanent pooling of lymphatic fluid in the arm.

“These are not theoretical harms,” Ms. Jaggar said

Ok I was not stage “0”. I was stage 2, yet still considered “early” . Once I got my diagnosis I wanted this stuff out of my body. I could no more have lived with this in my body at any stage. 

Studies like this or like the studies that say women don’t really need that many mammograms or Pap smears are irresponsible to women’s’ health initiatives . Studies like this terrify me, because they are an excuse for the insurance companies to run with denying women treatment. Can you imagine being told you have an early stage cancerous tumor and being told by your doctors as a result to wait yet you want it out ? Or being told as a result by your insurance company that having a tumor removed is an elective surgery so they won’t cover the surgery or treatment after? Isn’t this just another way of removing a woman’s right to choose?

 And that is the reality of the world in which we live in the United States: you have to fight for everything with your insurance company. They will give in on certain areas not given on others. If you have anything that resembles a robotic or laparoscopic surgery they expect you to jump off the operating table and run out of the door. You get treated for breast cancer, yet they won’t pay for the creams with your proven to alleviate pain and discomfort during radiation. You have to fight to get tests like bilateral breast MRIs. (As if anyone’s going to put themselves into a noisy whirring coffin because they have nothing better to do .)

I agree with some aspects of the article concerning reduced employment, earning less money, and emotional tolls and strains, and even lymphedema. I have at different times experiencd all of the above except for the lymphedema post breast cancer. But again, I could have not have ignored this. I can’t imagine being told you have any stage of breast cancer and then being told just to sit with it in your body and watch it. 

Some people opt against any form of cancer treatment. Some people opt for the surgeries but then don’t want radiation or breast cancer medicinal therapies (like Tamoxifen or aromatese inhibitors). But I have never met a woman that undergoes any form of breast cancer treatment willy-nilly. So to put out a study that says “let’s wait and see” terrifies me. Again it is potentially removing our rights to choose.

Breast-cancer strikes at the very core of your femininity. That is very true.     There are a lot of days where to say I feel unlovely and betrayed by my own body are an understatement. But I am alive. And I do not feel I would have been in an overall positive life position had I ignored my lump and my doctors said it was nothing to worry about.

Breast cancer changes everything, but the changes aren’t all bad. In a weird way it was so good for me because it freed me to literally live my life better. But if I had to do it all over again I would do it the same. And I definitely would not ever have adopted the attitude of “wait and see”, or been satisfied with doctors who adopted that attitude.

I really wish they would spend more money on study that found a cure or improved treatment, not basically fund studies to give insurance companies and hospital systems an excuse not to treat women with breast cancer. Because at the end of the day that’s what  the study says to me. I also do not care for the way the New York Times in a sense seems to support this position. I almost wondered a first if this was an article or an opinion essay.

Thanks for stopping by.

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surviving beautifully

surviving beautifully

So today started with a call from Aetna. Did I understand the nature of their recent letter? As in they are cancelling my current plan at the end of this year so I will have to choose a new one? Yes. The customer service representative who placed the call was super pleasant but I am still not pleased that I have to ride the choose-a-plan-merry-go-round again with Aetna after last year’s horror show.

Then I continued to go about my day and the mail arrived.  In it was a copy of a book I participated in called Surviving Beautifully by Victoria Tillotson and Lana Koifman . YAY!!!  After all their years of hard work, here it is!

Victoria is someone I met as I was beginning my breast cancer journey.  I periodically filled out questions she shot around to women she knew in various stages of treatment as she and Lana wrote the book and developed the wonderful website by the same name, Surviving Beautifully. (I also know Victoria as an amazing jewelry designer – you can find her on Etsy as Chic Metal!)

Anyway you can buy the book Surviving Beautifully on Amazon. You can buy the paperback as I did, or get a Kindle edition.

Getting through breast cancer is no small feat.  It is hard and what we go through as women on any number of levels can be more difficult than we ever let on.  Simple things like how you feel or how your hair feels even if it isn’t falling out are huge to those of us who have gone through treatment.

You have no idea how blah or unattractive you can feel until you have gone through breast cancer treatment.  It strikes at the core of our femininity like an itch that can’t always be scratched.  And me personally? I felt guilty and still do every time I deal with any of these feelings. I feel guilty because I am alive to complain, so that leaves me conflicted at the same times when I feel like crap for whatever reason.

This book is a nice practical, sympathetic, educational, and real voice in the wilderness of breast cancer books. I believe in the authors and Victoria in particular has been a supportive friend to me throughout my journey.

I will close by saying I wish this book and The Pink Moon Lovelies: Empowering Stories of Survival by another dear friend Nicki Boscia Durlester (which I also participated in) had been available to me when I was beginning this journey.  I participated in both of these book projects as a result of my cancer because I believe in paying it forward to those who come after me. 

Let me be abundantly clear however: I  do NOT  profit in any way from either of these books.  I am a part of each project because they are terrific and I believe in the authors and their mission to better the lives of cancer patients, especially breast cancer gals.

 

 

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oh joy. (not)

pink day lilyWarning: I am going to whine and piss and moan and complain. If you can’t handle that, stop reading NOW.

I am on a brief I-hate-Tamoxifen pity party of one.

No, I am not going to stop taking it, I like living.  But for all the good this drug does, there are times when it just sucks.

Like now.

I am tired of sitting at my desk or being out somewhere and I just start to sweat. Hot flashes of hellish proportions which leave me feeling like a damp wash cloth.

Miscellaneous joint pain sometimes.

And sleepus interruptus a good part of the time.

And have I mentioned the occasional and bizarre food cravings?

And of course the emotional and other brain functions things? I can be feeling fine and then it is like I am emotionally paralyzed…for no reason.  Or I have days where no matter what I do I just can’t concentrate and complete tasks at hand.

This is not all of the time but when it happens, it’s draining.  I am hopefully at the end of one of these jags. It has been about a week, maybe a little longer.  This little jaunt has been particularly bad. It’s July, so who in their right mind wants to sweat more?

And my patience is at zero and I feel crappy.

This too shall pass and eye on the prize is I continue to be really, really lucky.

But Tamoxifen? I won’t be missing you when my sentence is up.

And PS did I mention the letter from Aetna which says (and I quote):

Your health insurance with Aetna is ending on December 31, 2015.

We value our customers.  We want to help you understand your health plan options for 2016.

Aetna Life Insurance Company (Aetna) will no longer offer individual health products in the state of Pennsylvania effective January 1, 2016, but health plans will still be available from Aetna Life Insurance Company’s affiliate, Aetna Health Inc,

AGAIN Aetna? F-ing again? Really? It took me until March to get it all straightened out, which means I am paying already for a year I will not have had full use of. And now I get to do it again. Obamacare is a hot mess.

Here is some news on Aetna:

Aetna jumping ship in DC market

The nation’s capital is losing an insurance company on its exchange. It’s a trend consumers will likely see in other exchanges, says one health policy researcher.

According to The Washington Post, The Daily Caller and other news outlets, Aetna will no longer offer insurance plans on DC Health Link, aka the Washington, DC, health insurance change

Aetna plan to buy Humana under review. Deal would create No. 2 insurer in U.S.

Regulators in Pennsylvania and 17 other states will scour health insurer Aetna’s plan to buy rival Humana, looking for signs the proposed merger might drain competition, the Pennsylvania Insurance Department said Monday.

Hartford, Conn.-based Aetna Inc. announced July 3 it would buy Humana Inc. for about $37 billion in cash and stock. The deal would create the second-largest domestic health insurer by membership, with more than 33 million people covered.

But the companies need approval from the U.S. Department of Justice, which will rely in part on state regulators to evaluate how the acquisition might affect policyholders and regional insurance markets. Regulators in Kentucky, where Humana maintains its Louisville headquarters, will lead the state-level evaluation, according to the Pennsylvania Insurance Department.

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people magazine tabloidizes breast cancer

  

See that vision in leather, fake balloon boobs, and spandex with hair extensions? Her name (and it’s not her stage name apparently) is Amber Marchese. She is one of Bravo’s “Real Housewives” of New Jersey which except for The Real Housewives of Orange County is the most absurdly cartoonish of the franchise.

Anyway, as an insult (in my opinion) to women fighting this disease everywhere, People Magazine has made this woman a new voice and face of breast cancer.

I now feel under-dressed that I did not wear my good leather to radiation.

What a total and utter contrast to how TV Chef and domestic partner of New York Governor Adrew Cuomo Sandra Lee has handled sharing her cancer news and subsequent double mastectomy!  Sandra Lee has handled all of this with grace and style and has discussed the soup to nuts of breast cancer with dignity, intelligence, and good writing skills.

Then there is Amber, who not only does breast cancer survivors and patients a disservice, but women in New Jersey as well. Except I will admit the ex wife of one of my best friend’s boyfriends behaves like she rolls with this chick. (But I digress)

So which came first here, the chicken or the egg? Did People Magazine put out a call for additional “celebrity” breast cancer cases, or did her agent  shop her story out ? Sorry but I am a little too jaded to believe in coincidence here. Someone like this isn’t telling their story for the good of man and woman kind, they are telling the story because there’s a profit margin to be made. This Amber has had breast cancer before so maybe I would have found her more believable had she on her own shared her cancer story as  you know,  something that isn’t underwritten by a major magazine?

As my friend Nicki said:

No mention of genetic testing/counseling. With a father with pancreatic cancer, concerned about paternal side inheritance of BRCA mutation. Also had second bout of breast cancer after have a bilateral mastectomy for initial diagnosis .”

My breast cancer group, which is an international group of very diverse women is pretty much (thus far based on who has read it) agog in not such a positive way over this and not in a good way.  Generally speaking, because this woman now (because of a tabloid magazine and reality show franchise) becomes the new face of a disease that is not tabloidesque or cartoonish in the least. 

She’s had cancer before. There is family history and I get that how you deal with this is a personal choice, but why no mention of BRCA with BART arm testing? 

So I have slogged through her blog posts and all its literary finery (and why is hell capitalized??? Is it the name of the new town in New Jersey or something?)

… the test began, I was in complete control. I was good, totally dialed in. It started off easy: I heard tapping noises that wasn’t too terrible at all. I was softly praying “Our Father” and “Hail Mary,” and I was chugging along. I do not know why, but things took a turn for the worse – and I mean fast! …..I could not take it any longer. I yelled for the technicians, but there was nothing, no response! I lay for a little longer and then began yelling again, but again nothing! Now I was completely panicking. I started pressing the button once, then twice and then repeatedly pressed the button until my thumb was raw. I did not stop. I started screaming and yelling for them to get me the Hell out of there!

And then things like this:

Amber Marchese’s Blog: Cancer ‘Is Not My Reality’
Amber Marchese, star of The Real Housewives of New Jersey , is blogging about her second battle with cancer for PEOPLE. After surviving breast cancer in 2009, she discovered a lump, which turned out to be cancerous, in her right breast in April. Marchese will share updates on her treatment and how she is coping with this second round of the deadly disease with prayer, a positive outlook and the help of her family……Over the last few weeks, some days I was wracked with fear, others I glided through with no issues, almost as if my diagnosis was just an episode on TV. Seriously, this is not my reality. 
…..I did, however, slow down attending church, stopped praying as much and certainly did not pray the Rosary or a Novena in many years….Although the words came out of my mouth that I am a Catholic, I did not have God in my life as much as I should have. I knew in my heart I had wandered from my path, even despite my first bout with breast cancer and feeling God’s miracle once before. 
….I want to hear from you! As always, although I may not be able to answer all of you, I do read each and every one of your comments. If you have any questions or comments that you need to ask me, email me at ambermarcheseBC@gmail.com
See you next week and feel free to contact me on Facebook, Twitterand Instagram. 
God bless each and every one of you, 
Amber

Umm as a fellow Catholic girl I raise an eyebrow…maybe two over the whole Novena and Rosary of it all. If she was so concerned for her immortal soul, umm why is she a chief strumpet and bottle washer on a reality show where she often curses bleep, bleep, bleep like a sailor on television? It’s holier if you are making buckets of money?

Hey it’s her life and it  isn’t  as if she is the first “housewife” to have made money on her brand off of one of these TV shows. You have ones that cook, write cookbooks, try to sing, design clothes, promote toaster ovens in pasties, strip on television, and consider themselves Broadway “stars”. 

What I’m saying is a lot of these women are very entrepreneurial in a public sort of way, but monetizing breast-cancer never sits right with me. Sandra Lee and Angelina Jolie have used their celebrity for good in the fight against breast cancer and seem genuinely interested in seeing women get the best treatment  and best breast education possible. 

But Amber Marchesese? Not so much in my opinion. This woman uses her Catholocism as a convenient religious prop like a television preacher (or a Duggar, take your pick) and I can’t help but feel that this entire thing is a stunt to build  her “brand” and monetize her breast cancer while  People Magazine tabloidizes it.  

If she had just started blogging about it under the radar without fanfare and then People picked up maybe I wouldn’t have such a problem – but this whole thing smacks as designed for reality TV and an extra paycheck. Breast cancer is very real and not in a reality television show kind of way.

Just so we are clear I do not wish this Amber Marchese ill, I just find the timing suspect and the whole thing contrived like she is the front woman for the next season of the Real Housewives of New Jersey on Bravo.

It would be nice if she did something like donated a percentage of her fees she much be earning from People Magazine to a reputable breast cancer charity, or even back to the hospital where she is being treated to help other women who are less fortunate and could use the help through treatment. In other words,  use her celebrity more for good versus what feels like straight personal gain. 

And if Bravo  uses this as part of their storyline, one would hope they would donate part of their profits to well a place like the Cancer Hospital of NJ at Robert Wood Johnson in North Jersey. They are amazing there and I actually had a woman who works for that institution talk to me as one of the first people who spoke to me when I was newly diagnosed and she was amazing and I will never forget it. Come to think of it it would be really good sign of People Magazine   made a donation to someplace like that. After all, this  will sell them a lot of magazines.


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crazy on the corner

Just what I wanted to see on my way into see my breast cancer surgeon who saved my life four years ago. Shoo, fly crazy on the corner….

  

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four years

my mother and I flying a kite on the beach in Ocean City , New Jersey circa 1969 or 1970 (I think)

Today is a big day for me. It has been four years. This time, four years ago today I was being prepped for my breast cancer surgery.

I was fine when I woke up this morning, but have gotten progressively and oddly emotional . But they are happy tears.

Maybe today it is oddly apropos that I have another milestone and item off my bucket list: a little while from now I hang a photography show of all my work in a local restaurant. So I guess that meets the definition of a solo photography show, huh? 

If you want to see my photography and live in Pennsylvania, the images will hang the month of June at Christopher’s A Neighborhood Place on King Street in the Borough of Malvern.

Four years. Here I am looking forward. Mammogram later this week. Get your mammograms ladies.

Have a great day!

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the cycle of breast cancer: there is always someone else getting diagnosed and having surgery….

sandra lee1

Today Food Network star/show host and author Sandra Lee had her breast cancer surgery.

I have to admit she has handled this with grace, style and a positive attitude and in her own words from May 14th :

Controversy and confusion have always been a part of breast cancer diagnosis and treatment — and I’m learning all about that on a personal level since my own diagnosis. But please don’t let the sea of opinions cloud your own judgment, and get yourself screened. Don’t think because it’s not in your family you don’t need to be concerned. 5 to 10% of women diagnosed with breast cancer had the disease in their family. So 90 to 95 % were like me — with no family history.

 

She is through her surgery and in recovery and doing well according to media quotes from her boyfriend, New York Governor Andrew Cuomo. Like many women I now know, she opted for a double mastectomy.  According to her staff via Facebook, if you wish to send her a get well card, you ma do so to P.O. Box #3920, New York, NY 10185-3920.

There are so many people who happen to be celebrities who get diagnosed with breast cancer and well, are very annoying.  Sandra Lee, much like women’s fiction author Elin Hilderbrand have just handled this like…well…regular women. They have been human and honest and even humorous at times.

Here I am but a couple weeks away from my 4th cancerversary. I still consider myself one of the lucky ones. Some days are better than others, but heck I am around to complain about the bad days and celebrate the rest of them.

Life is what you make of it. You always think you know what is going to happen and then god or fate or whatever higher power you believe in throw in a plot twist.

Celebrate ladies. We are still around! Get well soon Sandra Lee!

 

 

 

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some days are better than others

peony

Heavy sigh.

Not having a good Monday.  Yes I have made all my appointments. But here I am in yet another week starting out feeling blue and useless and tired and constantly on the verge of tears. Sleep is also not my consistent friend.

I have no rational or external reason for this mood.  Today was unusually warm for this time of year and that I did not do well with that aspect of the day. Also today? Umpteenth call to creepy Joyce Meyer Ministries. Someone keeps signing me up for her brand of God.

But seriously, I am just so sick of the Tamoxifen/menopause moods. Unless you are experiencing this I don’t think you really get it.

It’s hard.

And I tried to explain how I was feeling to a certain someone who gets to live with this stuff along with me and it wasn’t easy.  I don’t think he understands. How could he. Not angry, just frustrated. Now I feel more on the verge of useless for no reason tears.

I am so sick of this.  I do my best to rise above and think positive but some days I feel like an alien lives inside me.

It sucks. It just sucks.  Ahh to be young and gay…instead of feeling about one hundred and seventy two. And with these mood swings often comes the almost inability to get through days and concentrate. That in and of itself is exhausting.

Tomorrow is another day Miss Scarlett, tomorrow is another day.  Eye on the prize is four years cancer free in just a few short weeks.

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survivor shaming

  I just approved a comment written by a woman who claims to be a breast cancer survivor. Apparently she took issue with one of the posts I wrote about what I feel are scammy and not helpful breast cancer “charities”. I am not linking back her particular comment, although it has provided the impetus for today’s post.

Every breast cancer survivor and patient is different just like no two cancers are hundred percent the same. This blog has been about my journey for the past four years, and will probably continue to be about my journey for years to come. Breast cancer is no “one and done even” even if you never get a recurrence. It’s something you live with. It’s how you handle what you’re living with that get you through. 

I write this blog because it keeps me real. I’m grateful and honored that I have been able to help some people with their journeys by expressing my own here. Don’t throw up on my blog and go all judging on me. You aren’t living in my head, walking in my shoes, and I don’t share everything that I am going through every day.

I have worked really hard to remain positive throughout this journey, and maybe I should write more about the days that are not so positive. 

I will admit that lately I have been struggling. I went back to work after taking time off and I am fortunate and blessed that I can set my own schedule. But what I am discovering even a few years post surgery and post radiation my new reality is my brain is no longer the same. Menopause and tamoxifen are taking their toll. I refuse to let either get the best of me and I will remain on my positive path but there are some days I am just frustrated. 

Some days I have zero energy or bizarre aches and pains or like today a hard time concentrating. I feel like a total wimp admitting these things. Some days I look in the mirror and I just want to cry. This disease does attack the core of your femininity. And while most of the time I am okay there are some days I just wish I could rewind the clock. But I can’t. 

The upside is that for every bad day I work through I know I am rewarded with many blessings and many good days ahead. But it just irritates this not out of me when I get one of these comments from some random person out there in Internet land thinks they can know or judge me.

One thing that really irritated me is this woman’s pronouncement that I must’ve been one of those women that was able to pay for everything having to do with breast cancer easy peasy. News flash, not that it is anyone’s business but my own, I am still paying for my radiation bill. 

And every once in a while when I think some procedure, surgery, or test is done and paid for and finished I see that my insurance company and the hospital system are still wrangling over who’s paying for what.

But there’s only so much I can control. So reluctantly I have had to learn to roll with it.

I have spent the last few years feeling like every time I turn around I have to go see a doctor or have a test. Subconsciously I think it had gotten to me a little because I realize this week when I was going to see my oncologist that I had forgotten to schedule a mammogram first.

I’m tired of not sleeping and I’m tired of hot flashes. But I am also mindful of the fact that I am grateful to God to be alive. But the way I have handled my cancer journey is not necessarily the way everyone is going to handle their personal journey. And I realize that but at the same time I am not going to put up with random survivors rolling up on my blog and telling me how I should be or trying to survivor shame me.

This woman also made this bizarre comment about her breasts trying to kill her. Lady, our breasts are trying to kill us, they have a disease inside them which tried to harm us.  I do not think my breasts tried to kill me, they just happen to have something bad grow within which was removed.

As I approach my fourth anniversary of being cancer free I am mindful of my blessings. But like every other woman who has had breast cancer I have my bad days and my fears of recurrence. Unfortunately this is natural. It’s not pleasant but I keep moving forward. 

June 1st is my next cancerversary. Yay me! Thanks for stopping by today.

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fight smart



Painting by American Artist Richard E Miller (1875-1943), and titled Reflections at the Dressing Table.

Okay I’m going to say something here which will undoubtedly ruffle feathers.  It has to do with tamoxifen and other breast cancer drugs, oncotype scores, and taking yourself off your meds….without discussing it with your care team.

Do I like what tamoxifen has done to my body? Hell no. But I don’t want to die from a breast cancer recurrence either. So I will stay on this as long as my doctors say.

Radiation gave me osteopenia, so after a couple years on tamoxifen and a full hysterectomy I was not a candidate for aromatase inhibitors….because they contribute to bone density loss among other things.

One of my friend’s mothers was a test patient for tamoxifen when it was first being introduced over 30 years ago. She is living proof that the drug works.  I don’t believe I’m part of some pharmaceutical conspiracy other then I think the cost of drugs a ridiculous even when you have health insurance that supposed to be good.

I am sure about one thing: there are no easy answers when it comes to breast cancer. But I would rather be alive. So when I see threads of conversation in breast cancer support groups where women essentially musing to take themselves off of their meds, it upsets me greatly. I also have to bite my tongue and resist the urge to say anything most of the time.

Adverse reactions  breast cancer meds like tamoxifen, even those ones our friends and family can’t see are very real. Which is why I also get upset when you have ignorant people who have not been through breast cancer, let alone ever taken a breast cancer drug like tamoxifen and they say things like the side effects are psychosomatic, or in layman’s terms made up in our heads. Anyone who says that to you is a truly ignorant person and you should feel free and no uncertain terms to tell them that. 

They are as bad as the ones who come to you with the names of several plastic surgeons when you’re barely out of surgery.  I had that happen to me and it was very upsetting. I didn’t even know at that point if they had gotten all the cancer out and if I was going to be having radiation treatment or radiation and chemotherapy. I felt crappy and I know these people were trying to help but all they did was make me cry when no one was around.  

Trust me, I suffer with the whole self body image worse after breast cancer. I look in the mirror and I have breasts going into different directions because one is only part of a breast at this point.  But , I still think I made the right decision when I decided to not have breast reconstruction. I know in my heart of hearts that I am just not a woman destined to have reimagined boobs. 

I also wish to remind those who talk about their oncotype scores, especially when they are low. Mine is low – it’s a 10 – but my score and everyone else’s is predicated on the presumption that I am going to have treatment and take breast cancer meds as a preventative.

I know taking these drugs is hard – I’m doing it and I am looking at a potential of 10 years – they will reevaluate me at 5 years which is in a year. But we shouldn’t be playing doctors on ourselves

So if you need a change of meds or you really can’t tolerate the meds you are on, for the love of God don’t just take yourself off something. Go to your doctor. For example, the different generics of the breast cancer meds affect women differently and it’s not necessarily because of the actual drug it’s things like the binders and inert additives that cause the reactions. I discovered that the when I went from having annoying side effects of tamoxifen to I really felt sick – they had changed my generic, and the formulation is not 100% the same from generic to generic. So needless to say at my local pharmacy there is now a note from my oncologist and my hospital system that I only be given specific generics. I actually wrote about this when it happened someplace on this blog.

My final comment, is that we all have to remember that each cancer is different in each person. Sometimes  we see people talking about their reactions to meds, and there is a very good chance it won’t necessarily affect you or affect you in the same way. 

I discovered my inner courage fighting this disease, and I urge all of you to remember that you have that steely core within you. Breast-cancer hits the core of our very femininity, no doubt about it.  Not trying to downplay it. I just believe that every woman needs to make smart decisions, not necessarily ones based on vanity.

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