at the end of breast cancer awareness month, a woman continues to target breast cancer survivor (me)

Recently I wrote about the woman whom seems a little obsessed with me, and not in a healthy way. We are now at the end of #PinkTober or #BreastCancerAwarenessMonth and the same woman still is a bit obsessed with me. She posted the item on the left in the collage yesterday. I didn’t personally see it because I blocked her on social media so I just don’t have to see her stuff.

The funniest thing is about what this woman posted is the photo she posted of the woman smoking above isn’t me. I’m a breast cancer survivor, I don’t smoke, after 10 years of tamoxifen and hot flashes I don’t even ever have more than one or two glasses of wine every couple of months. So I’m guessing that’s like some blonde joke on brunettes that we all look alike. The other thing about that photo in particular is I have not been to a public meeting since COVID hit. Truthfully I’ve been very few places since COVID hit, even after having received my third a.k.a. “booster” shot. I don’t go any place that is a large crowd or that I am not sure of the status of the people in attendance. That particular photo was taken at one of these crazy recent school board meetings near where I live in Southeastern Pennsylvania. And they are a mob scene because of all the ant-vaxxer anti-maskers.

I live a permanently immunocompromised life, we all do if we have had or are going through treatment or are newly diagnosed with breast cancer. So for me personally? I support the parents in the school districts who are trying to do the best by their kids. And that means COVID shots and masks. And I support the teachers and educators in all of the school districts who also want the same. I do not respect or support the people fighting them on this, and the woman who keeps posting things about me, is one of those people.

She has made herself a public figure by making herself a public spectacle. She literally flips out at meetings (it has been caught on video). She has been quoted and has given quote to the media. She posts bizarre thing on Facebook publicly. She is lead in litigation against a local school district thus far denied by courts based on what has been published.

Why am I posting this on my breast cancer blog? Because it’s still #PinkTober (which I honestly dislike as mentioned before) and she still targeting me and I am a 10 year breast cancer survivor and I have a right, to my opinion regarding masks and vaccines. Why? Because I live a permanently immunocompromised life. And people like this put anyone who is immunocompromise at risk. It’s not fiction, it’s science. Which of course is why I also don’t get why these people don’t want children protected?

And by going through my archives here I was able to date the photo she used of me in the hospital gown. And you know when that was? When I was getting the needle biopsy and other testing before my breast cancer surgery. She posted it like an FBI most wanted poster. Someone told me yesterday it’s still up. Why she chose that photo is known only to her. But as I said recently, could it be a purely bitchy female move as to embarrass me by posting a photo of a me in a hospital gown? Is it to bully me? Come after me? I still don’t really know her motivation, and I honestly don’t care. But it made me reflect on the past decade, a little more in depth then on my 10th breastcancerversary or the recent date of stopping Tamoxifen.

So in the spirit of that reflection I’m going to post another collage. It might offend some people because although certain parts are covered up and tinted to be more artistic, they are of my breast of which there is 10 years later less than half left. The last photo is a recent one. My hand has aged 10 years and so has the breast it is very shrunken, and sometimes yes it bothers me, but I know I don’t want fake breasts.

Today, me and my very shrunken left breast are stepping out into the light. I have survived 10 years post breast cancer as of June 1. Or 10 years just recently because it’s the anniversary of finishing my radiation. Or 10 years as of September having finished my Tamoxifen.

So if this woman wants to run around posting photos of me, and ranting and raving that’s on her. If she wants people in her community to start crossing the street when they see her coming, whom am I to interfere?

This is definitely one of the odder things about my journey, but because photos of me are being posted from 10 years ago in a hospital gown as I began my breast cancer journey I consider this part of the journey

The final collage is the very personal various stages of going through this. Just after surgery, well into radiation when your skin feels and looks like raw meat (the photos with what looks like a rash – my skin was raw and burned towards the end ), and 10 years later when everything has shrunken down and you’re 10 years older, the breast is 10 years older, your hand is 10 years older. It’s a very humbling experience.

This disease can be hard on your body and your psyche. But I am not ashamed of my journey with this. So that is my take away from the continued attention of this woman. None of us are perfect, especially after coming through a disease like this. Don’t be ashamed, wear your scars with pride.

About carla

Writer, blogger, photographer, breast cancer survivor. I write about whatever strikes my fancy as I meander through life.
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