milestones: the last dose of tamoxifen

It was just a little note in my calendar. But it’s a very big event. The note says “stop taking Tamoxifen after today.”

Ten years ago I started taking Tamoxifen. Prior to this, I took very little medicine. Mostly allergy medicine and ibuprofen or Tylenol. Sometimes antibiotics, and well back in the day, birth control pills. Taking a drug every day for 10 years hasn’t been fun, and there have been times over the course of a decade I seriously wished I didn’t have to take it. But I didn’t want to be one of those people that just suddenly took themselves off a breast cancer drug they were prescribed. And there have been times over the past decade when I have seen women comment in breast cancer chats that they’ve done just that.

I can honestly say that over the course of the past 10 years I was more scared to NOT be on tamoxifen, than to be taking it.

So here we are.

I have survived a decade on this drug and I am cancer free at present. Tamoxifen did it’s job and I’m not going to rehash all the issues I’ve experienced over a decade because this is the last day. The very last day.

I did it! I got through it!

How do I feel about this? I’m not sure is my short answer. I am so glad I am here 10 years later to tell you I can stop taking Tamoxifen, but part of me is also a little nervous. It’s kind of like going forward walking the tight rope without a net isn’t it? But if the drug has done it’s job, and buy all testing and examinations, it has done it’s job. So from my doctors’ lips to God’s ears, I will be fine.

I remember when my oncologist and I had the discussion about stopping Tamoxifen at the 10 year mark, it took me a while to comprehend that I didn’t taper off, I just stopped taking the meds.

I think I deserve a merit badge or at least a nice piece of jewelry for surviving 10 years of the stuff.

Well I am signing off for now. I just wanted to take a moment to also recognize this milestone in my breast cancer journey.

Be well dear readers and thanks for being here all of these years.

About carla

Writer, blogger, photographer, breast cancer survivor. I write about whatever strikes my fancy as I meander through life.
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