This post will be brief. I am still recovering from my surgery and I am tired and sore and not quite me yet.
This post is for families of women who have just received a breast cancer diagnosis. I have a couple of friends going through this and I wish I was closer geographically to them that I could just give big hugs. These are folks whose mothers are of the the newly diagnosed, and given the fact that my own mother is recovering from open heart surgery, oh my, I get it. Truly I do.
Every cancer is different and so is every cancer patient. But the best thing you can do for them is to believe in their recovery, believe in them, love them and be positive advocates. When we are fighting and as we go through our treatments and become survivors, quite frankly negativity needs to NOT be part of our lives.
Negativity + Drama = Stress. We don’t want that even when we are feeling sorry for ourselves or annoyed at something.
Cancer affects the whole family. We as the cancer patient feel alone and it is individualistic, but although it is happening to us, by proxy it is happening to our loved ones.
I am not going to tell everyone how to feel, only that being positive and resolving to see the other side positively made all the difference for me.
I will be blunt and say I struggled emotionally leading up to my hysterectomy surgery a little over a week ago now. I know why, and part of it had to do with part of my support system, my mother, being in the hospital and having open heart surgery two days before my surgery. I felt very unsure of myself, was even scared this time. A few old emotional demons haunted me. But in the midst of it was my sweet man, ever loving and ever patient.
I got through.
So you as loved ones can do this. Believe in your breast cancer gals and be positive and love one and other. We need positive companionship.
There will be plenty of days where it is all not light and love, but you as our support system can help us make lemons out of lemonade. You are also our advocates and extra ears at all the darn doctors and other related appointments. You are our extra eyes with the reams of paperwork. With a team of loved ones on our side we can conquer the world and ensure we get the best possible care. You make sure we learn to take better care of ourselves. Think of it as a team effort.
Even if you piss us off, don’t let us wallow in the darkness. Help us climb to the light of survival.
You all can do this. Just believe. And baby steps one day at a time.
Sending love to those who need it.