my tired is tired….

Oy vey what a long day!  Office then off to meet the radiation oncologist.  Totally dig her and much like my gyno and breast surgeon, she wears fab shoes – yes – yes I  love shoes…I think I have mentioned that.

Anyway it was a good and hopefully get to know one and other productive session even if I left the office without retrieving all of the copies of my films on CD.

Yes another day done in the seemingly unending saga of Breast Cancer Mardi Gras.  

A couple of things about today.  First of all I met yet another new nurse.  Really nice lady but we had some extra stuff to go over because she couldn’t read my handwriting on some of those forms.  No, she did not ask me about my sex life (that’s just for the forms, apparently), but she did seem to ask quite a few questions about alcohol intake. 

I am sorry but I am not in any of the specific boozoriffic categories, I told her.  I had not had any wine since before my surgery and I had one glass on Friday night and in the end it upset my stomach.  I don’t drink beer, am allergic to red wine and most hard liquors, so I am basically pretty boring.  I might have a couple of glasses of wine a weekend for a couple of months and then have nothing alcoholic at all for a few months after that – there is no rhyme nor reason – but that seems to confuse some medical professionals.

I was amused to meet another doctor who seemed to have a quizzical “is she always like this” look on her face until she was with me a bit.  Sorry docs, I am someone who is just on until they are off.

Humor moment came when we were discussing smelling and supplements.  I have to divorce myself from a lot of supplements during radiation (which is SEVEN weeks NOT six, damn it all), and in the course of that we were talking about my whey shakes and the doctor said something about giving up my whey and having kale.  I asked as in fresh kale for breakfast?  I know I made a face because as much as I love breakfast, I am not having kale for breakfast. Sorry but yuck.  Other humor was my smell obsession – apparently I don’t wear anything but corn starch during treatment.  Ummm….really? Doctor says well when the time comes, if it doesn’t work we can talk about other things. (Yes, please)

But after I left the radiation oncologist it was like someone let me hit a wall.  I felt light-headed, exhausted and between my bruised tail bone and the boob and my throbbing head ache, I am ready for a spa day or something I think and I don’t even regularly spa. (and someone should send my friend Linda on a spa day for continuing to drive Ms. Daisy’s ass around so she is not alone for these appointments )

They should let women in this country just be able to go through breast cancer treatment and not worry about everything, you know?  Like switching it up to mostly organic foods.  It’s damn expensive around here.

When I came home a mysterious box was waiting for me. From Charleston, South Carolina.  I am looking at it and looking at it and thinking I know I did not order anything so I opened it and it was basically this cool box full of tea, honey, grits,hot pepper jelly, SC rice, and other goodies including these bits of goodness called Benne Wafers (which are totally addictive they are so good). And I make sweet tea southern style and now I have the proper tea!

As I dig through the box wondering who knew me that well to send me stuff I just loved (and I do love things Southern – the foods of the Carolinas are yummy)…so I come across a note on beautiful informals from a woman I reconnected with on Facebook who is one of my oldest friends.  She had seen this blog and sent me a goody box.

To my first Karen, thank you.  I was so tired and out of sorts when I came home even if I did get to go to this appointment with one of the dearest women and best pairs of ears…and once again, my friends have lifted me up.

And then there are the others who just check in – one of my oldest and dearest guy friends in the world called to say hey today,another one of my gals, who caught me up on some local issues, and another old and dear friend who gave me this bag just full of books to read, another who sent me treats after surgery and spent part of her weekend in town to visit her dad with me –  these people as well, created a diversion, making me think  of life outside this blasted breast cancer.  All of my friends leave me feeling incredibly blessed, so how can I not stay positive? (o.k. yes, yes, I have these moments, but thanks to my personal support team they are just that– moments)

Yes I know, soon I will be set for the balance of my treatment and through it, but right now, every crack oozes something breast cancerish.

So yes, my tired is tired, but another day is done…and yo’, I know there are some editors as in newspapers and magazines out there who are reading this blog and I gotta’ tell you, you people know I can write so why not give me a column?  I think I would make a divine syndicated columnist, don’t you?

About carla

Writer, blogger, photographer, breast cancer survivor. I write about whatever strikes my fancy as I meander through life.
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1 Response to my tired is tired….

  1. Karen says:

    I am so glad you got the box. Enjoy the southern stuff. Yes, sweet tea is all the rage down here and (I am sure) the cause of such a high rate of diabetes I am thinking of you and am hoping the radiation will not be too rough. I think you and your family have had enough already………Love from, Karen.

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